From my experience and observations, most people don't grow out of being addicted, they simply shift their focus of addiction.
This often goes unnoticed because there are many people who are addicted to things that the majority of society wouldn't consider an addiction. One might give up an "unhealthy" addiction for a socially acceptable one. Or their unhealthy addiction may simply shift, from one substance to another, or one activity to another, or one interest to another.
The more I've observed addiction the more I've realized that we are all addicts. I am addicted to water, yoga, meditation, HN, reddit, coding, etc. I've even come to realize that we are actually addicted to certain types of thoughts or ways of thinking. Addiction to "negative" thoughts is what results in "unhealthy" behavior.
I am currently addicted to observing myself for potential patterns of addiction and have gone so far as to create a simple app [1] that in a way takes control of the decision process away from myself. It produces a simple "yes" / "no" response and I'll ask it throughout the day if I realize I have a choice to make. "Do I go to yoga today?" -> "No".
The process of giving up control of my decisions was unnerving at first, but the more I practice it, the more peaceful I have become.
That's actually unbelievably eye-opening for me. I'm dealing with a family member who, for the last three years, has slid into alcoholism head first. We've not been able to put an identifier on when or why it started, but it started. Looking at it now, though, he has always been the kind of person who has a 'project' going at home that he is unbelievably tied up in; woodworking, singing, hunting, metalworking. Always something. We've always assumed it was some kind of high-functioning autism or some other kind of tic caused by his childhood.
Looking at it with your lens, though, it's just an addictive personality. He's always gone full-bore into everything. Always. Now, instead of a socially acceptable 'hobby,' it's drinking.
I am glad that perspective helped, it has helped me tremendously. If you are more curious, I'd suggest investigating the book called A Course In Miracles. It clearly defines the addictive thinking patterns and the way through them.
I think you're misusing the term "addiction". Addiction is destructive compulsive behavior.
I don't think it's very helpful in this conversation to talk about addictions as being Buddhist-like "attachments"--that is a completely separate topic. Addiction treatment isn't necessarily about controlling compulsion, it's about controlling destructive compulsion.
While I agree that the normal connotation of addiction is something that is destructive, I've expanded my definition of addiction to something that is a "mood altering dependency".
Previously, if I didn't meditate regularly, I would get irritable and become less harmonious. I became addicted to meditation as a way to prevent myself from becoming moody. I have found that yoga, swimming, and other "healthy" activities have the same effect on me. Ultimately all they do is alter my mental state and I would become edgy if someone interfered with my practice.
While I realize this a logical stretch for most people, I can see the addictive quality in my need for many seemingly healthy activities in my life. I am saying this as a person whom for many years has identified most closely with Buddhism.
The coin flip decision making is an interesting and fun experiment. Sometimes when going out with friends we'll leave all decisions for the night up to the coin. It is freeing and irksome when a choice does not go the way you want.
I totally agree. I actually started out using a coin, but I got too embarrassed walking around the store, standing in front of a bunch of choices, and flipping through options. The was one of the motivations to create the app, since it is much more socially acceptable and easier to use, than catching a quarter over and over.
This often goes unnoticed because there are many people who are addicted to things that the majority of society wouldn't consider an addiction. One might give up an "unhealthy" addiction for a socially acceptable one. Or their unhealthy addiction may simply shift, from one substance to another, or one activity to another, or one interest to another.
The more I've observed addiction the more I've realized that we are all addicts. I am addicted to water, yoga, meditation, HN, reddit, coding, etc. I've even come to realize that we are actually addicted to certain types of thoughts or ways of thinking. Addiction to "negative" thoughts is what results in "unhealthy" behavior.
I am currently addicted to observing myself for potential patterns of addiction and have gone so far as to create a simple app [1] that in a way takes control of the decision process away from myself. It produces a simple "yes" / "no" response and I'll ask it throughout the day if I realize I have a choice to make. "Do I go to yoga today?" -> "No".
The process of giving up control of my decisions was unnerving at first, but the more I practice it, the more peaceful I have become.
[1] http://www.holyspiritsays.com