This resonates with me pretty strongly, as does “Why Nerds Are Unpopular”. Both match my experience as a teen (back in the 1970s) and my observation since. While I’ve written a little about some of the same phenomena, these two essays do an astounding job of documenting and explaining what I had not processed as thoroughly.
One thing struck me, though. Several motivations for lying to teens about sex are cited, and I certainly agree that those motivations are important. However, I was surprised that an important one was overlooked, since it figures so prominently in “Why Nerds Are Unpopular”.
In that essay, the argument is made that teens are penned up in school because they no longer have a place in a modern economy. Since a teen can’t support a family, preventing sex, the biological purpose of which is to, well, start a family, becomes a priority. So there may be a pragmatic reason as well as sentimental ones for lying about sex.
NB: I’m not one of those “abstinence-only” types; I’m a firm believer in the old military adage that one should never give orders that will not be obeyed and cannot be enforced. (I agree with the prescription given in the essay, to give teens the straight dope, but to impress on them that their judgment may not always be trustworthy.) Abstinence certainly is effective at preventing conception, though, and when loaded with cultural and sentimental baggage to give it more power, the development of such a fundamental dissonance between society and biology makes perfect sense.
One thing struck me, though. Several motivations for lying to teens about sex are cited, and I certainly agree that those motivations are important. However, I was surprised that an important one was overlooked, since it figures so prominently in “Why Nerds Are Unpopular”.
In that essay, the argument is made that teens are penned up in school because they no longer have a place in a modern economy. Since a teen can’t support a family, preventing sex, the biological purpose of which is to, well, start a family, becomes a priority. So there may be a pragmatic reason as well as sentimental ones for lying about sex.
NB: I’m not one of those “abstinence-only” types; I’m a firm believer in the old military adage that one should never give orders that will not be obeyed and cannot be enforced. (I agree with the prescription given in the essay, to give teens the straight dope, but to impress on them that their judgment may not always be trustworthy.) Abstinence certainly is effective at preventing conception, though, and when loaded with cultural and sentimental baggage to give it more power, the development of such a fundamental dissonance between society and biology makes perfect sense.