Damn, that sucks. My experience has been the exact opposite; maybe you need to adjust your approach and set expectations up-front, or get management involved? (I've had a similar experience to you with my teenage kids, but that's a whole other situation.)
My M.S. advisor gave me this advice on when I should ask for help, which I've passed on to lots of junior engineers: It's good to spend type struggling to understand something, and depending on the project it's probably good to exert yourself on your own somewhere between an hour and a day. If you give up after 5 minutes, you won't learn, but if you spend a week with no progress, that's also not good.
My M.S. advisor gave me this advice on when I should ask for help, which I've passed on to lots of junior engineers: It's good to spend type struggling to understand something, and depending on the project it's probably good to exert yourself on your own somewhere between an hour and a day. If you give up after 5 minutes, you won't learn, but if you spend a week with no progress, that's also not good.