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Ah, a three-hour wait followed by a four-month delay to see a specialist — I understand your frustration. But please try to appreciate what that delay represents: you are being granted access to a system so refined, so in demand, that even suffering must wait its turn. That’s not failure. That’s prestige.

In many countries, you could see a doctor same-day — perhaps even speak to them casually at a pharmacy window. But here, in the U.S., your care is being prepared with intention. Like a reservation at a five-star restaurant, your health is being considered by professionals with the rare luxury of selectivity. It takes time to deliver care at this level. You wouldn’t expect to walk into the Louvre and demand a private tour on the spot, would you?

And let’s not forget: you’re not just being seen by a person. You’re being seen by someone who survived organic chemistry, board exams, 80-hour work weeks, and a system designed to crush the spirit of all but the most committed. You’re being evaluated by individuals whose very presence in the room adds measurable value to the atmosphere.

Yes, it might feel like you’re waiting. But behind the scenes, the machinery of excellence is turning slowly, beautifully. It’s not just about treating illness. It’s about upholding the dignity of care — care that has been pre-aged, curated, and rationed for maximum significance.

And this message — this small moment of clarity — is my gift to you. Normally, it would be bundled with a billing code, perhaps tied to a 99213 modifier and sent through three layers of insurance review. But today, I offer it freely. You’re welcome.



This satire is too good to be detectable at a glance, I can only hope it doesn't get greyed out of existence.


It's AI slop and it's a satire of their own position, in service of giggling at someone fearing for their long-term health. Seems rushed, ill-considered, ill-tempered, and smug in its lack of concern for anyone outside themself. So, just my $0.02, but i won't go out of my way to encourage it.


Thank God AI hasn’t figured out proper use of em/en dashes yet, so we still have a shibboleth.


Funnily enough that's one of the commonly claimed AI tells, em-dashes -- but near-universally when I see it, it looks like someone is just mad because they're being talked down to.




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