I'm convinced that corporate Agile is a Mornington Crescent-like game in which a team pretends to be an effective team that responds to vague, changing requirements with adaptable solutions... but they're really engaged in appeasing upper management, who have already set a budget and a deadline, with burndown charts and good JIRA velocity numbers.

If so, there is at least hope of it being brought to a sudden, swift conclusion.

And be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.